My beautiful fiance published a post on her
blog that was very, well intriguing to say the least. First I love the fact that we have varying perspectives on many aspects of life and everything in between. However when it comes to the "tradition" of marriage we are to keep simple (different)!
Truth is I was in a failed relationship, and was completely disengaged from my now ex-wife in the latter years of our marriage (17 Years). I hated every minute of not being fulfilled in a relationship I
vowed before God to honor and respect. However, I saw my marriage license and vow as a contract that symbolized my commitment as a husband. As a man I take my responsibilities serious, and continue to feel that a man is bound to his word, which was represented by the marriage license I signed. It was gut wrenching to contemplate divorcing myself from not only my marriage, but also my "word." I felt like as a man I failed to uphold the very nature of my masculinity and the essence of my manhood by not honoring my "word" to remain committed even though I new the marriage was over. How could I look my children in the face, especially my sons, and contradict what I have taught them all their lives about honoring your word. I know, I know, I still
bounced! I don't regret pursuing my happiness with a women I truly love. But I still believe in the principle of honor as it relates to commitment, even if conditions aren't favorable for that commitment to thrive (
at least for a good minute).
I understand my (boo thang's) perspective. And trust me I respect her position. But I believe as a man, and particularly as a
PND, it's imperative that I impart some principles that guide my kid's ability to honor their commitments. AND use wisdom in determining when to disengage from any relationship (
situation) that prohibits there fulfillment as a person.
The Great Debate from my perspective is how to honor your commitment to yourself while respecting those who have based "their" commitment off of your actions. I'm committed to Ms. "
Hey Sis" because she's dope, and I've learned to commit to my damn-self first above all others. I believe my fiance is committed the same way, and that is no "
Debate."
